I was watching Shameless the other day and one of the six Gallagher siblings, the youngest sister—Debs, said "I wish I could skip the part where I don't know what to do and go to the part where I do."
She was talking about liking boys, and amen isn't that the truth. Do we ever figure that out?
I think that's how we feel about so much of life. Let me just skip through the storms, the icky, the hurt and pain and let me get to the part where I'm good at this and I know what I'm doing.
Especially in dieting. You wish you could stop saying you could just eat one bite and then find yourself 3/4 of a pint deep, wallowing in self hate, not understanding why you couldn't stop.
You want to get to the part where you know what you're doing, you feel good and happy, right? Which is why you continue to choose diet after diet—they are your fast lane to success you think.
Ahh yes this one, you say. 21 days to abs? Hell yes, nice and quick, then I'll be happy.
You Can't Find Happiness This Way
It would be perfect though, wouldn't it? Just like in that Adam Sandler movie, Click, where you could fast forward, rewind and pause time. The things I use to dream about if I had one of those. I would skip every break-up, every time I got in trouble and anytime I was hurt.
The pain and the storms, all the stuff we want to move through so quickly—we were designed to go through it. Not to push it away. It matters. It's where we grow and learn.
It's not fun. LOL. Not fun.
The only way we can get to the other side, where we know what do (at least more than before) is to do the work and show up for ourselves.
If it's in regards to dieting—If you don't want to diet, you have to do the unsexy work of learning how to trust your body.
If it's a relationship that ended, you have to feel the feelings. You can't push them away just waiting to get to the next person where you're happy again.
A song I heard in yoga once said this:
Some may light to fight it
Try to plan a secret attack
But the more you push it
The more it's pushing you back
You can't rush your healing
Darkness has its teachings
Love? is never leaving
You can't rush your healing
You can't Rush Your Healing
What you want to rush, is where the healing and growth will happen and I know that's super annoying to hear because we want instant gratification. You can buy a plane ticket on your phone to Alaska in under 20 seconds, why should you have to feel pain, or the icky stuff?
To break habits, to learn, to grow and to evolve.
If you want to love your body, hating yourself won't get there you, neither will extreme dieting.
If you want to be happy post break-up, you gotta feel whats happening for you and not push it away.
If you want to heal your injured ankle, you have to do the rehab, show up for yourself and body daily, and then you can go skiing and play basketball again.
How can you show up for yourself, feel whats asking to be felt, do what needs to be done (no matter how unsexy and boring it is) so you can get to the part where you know what you're (kind of) doing and happy?